A  Gay  Old  Man  Am  I. 


576 


DICK  &  FITZGERALD,  Publishers, 
NEW  YORK. 


<  *     MEG'S  DIVERSION.     Drama;  pathetic,  humorous  and  picturesque ;  2  acts; 


jj       COME,DIE,S  AND  DRAMAS 

15  CENTS  EACH 

M.  F.    I) 

i    ALL  THAT   GLITTERS   IS   NOT   GOLD  (The  Factory  Girl).     Comic 
(j  Drama  of  great  force  ;  2  acts  ;  2  hours 6    3     $ 

<  i    ARABIAN   NIGHTS,  THE.     Farcical  comedy;  always  a  great  success  with 

i  >  amateurs  ;  3  acts  ;  2%  hours 4    5     vfc 

'  :     BARBARA.     Drama;  well-written  romantic  story  with  touches  of  genuine 

humor;  i  act  ;  50  minutes 2    2    )! 

/  v     BETSY.     Farcical  comedy;  keeps  audience  in  roars  of  laughter  to  final  cur-  ty 

/  i,  tain ;  3  acts  ;  1%  hours 7    6    ty 

li  BETWEEN  TWO  FIRES.    Military  drama  :  3  acts  ;  2  hours 8    3    \l 

[^  BROKEN    PROMISES.      Strong  temperance    play  of  unflagging  interest, 

j{  relieved  with  much  eccentric  humor  ;  5  acts  ;   i^hours 6    3    5! 

/J\  BY  FORCE  OF  IMPULSE.     (Off  to  the  War.)    Military  drama;  comic 

A  and  emotional ;  5  acts  ;  aj^  hours 9    3    ty 

<  >  CASTE.     Comedy  that  always  delights  the  public  ;  3  acts ;  2%  hours 5    3    <& 

2?  CRAWFORD'S  CLAIM:    OR,  NUGGET  NELL.    Good  rattling  Western 

drama ;  4  acts;  2%  hours 9    3    c 

'     CRICKET  ON  THE  HEARTH,  THE.    Dickens' story  dramatized  ;  3  acts  ; 

2  hours 6    6    \j 

DEACON'S  TRIBULATIONS,   THE.     Comedy  drama.     A  worthy  sue- 

cessor  to  the  ever-popular  "  Deacon  ";  4  acts  ;  2  hours  84^ 

EAST  LYNN E.    Standard  drama ;  5  acts  ;  2%  hours 8    7 

ENGAGED.     Society  comedy  ;  full  of  burlesque  fun  ;  3  acts  ;  2%  hours 5     5    {j 

&    FROM  PUNKIN  RIDGE.     Domestic  drama  ;  successful  wherever  produced ; 

i  act ;  i  hour 6    3    \f 

J  [    HOME.     Comedy;  fresh  dialogue  and  genuine  humor  combined  with  a  very 

strong  plot ;  3  acts;  2  hours 43(1 

<  \    HONEY-MOON  ECLIPSE,  A.     Comedy  marked  by  spirited  dialogue  and  an 

(i  abundance  of  comic  incidents  ;  i  act ;  30  minutes i     2    \/ 

*l    IMOGENE;  OR,  THE  WITCH'S  SECRET.     Realistic  drama  sure  of  being 

enthusiastically  received  everywhere  ;  4  acts ;  2 J^  hours 8    4    j 

*    IN  HONOR  BOUND.     Drama  always  given  with   entire  success;    i   act; 

Ji  hour 2    2    ^ 

JACK  FOR  EVERY  JILL,  A.    A  most  successful  comedy ;  i  act ;  Ji  hour.    4    4    y 
$    JEMIMA,    OR,   THE    WITCH    OF    BENDER.      Very   laughable  in  its 

absurd  complications  ;  3  acts  ;  2  hours 4  ,4    f 

JUST    FOR    FUN.     Up-to-date  society  comedy.     The  piece  is  cheerfully 

recommended;  3  acts  ;  2  hours 24 

LA  CIGALE.     (The   Grasshopper.)    Comedy  sometimes  played  as  "The 

Circus  Girl";  3  acts;  3  hours  t3    4 

9    LADY  OF  LYONS,  THE.    Romantic  Drama  ;  5  acts  ;  aj^  hours 8    5 

j(    LADY  AUDLEY'8  SECRET.     Emotional  drama;  2  acts;  ij<  hours 4    3 

'.  >     MAJOR  ABORN'S  PROPOSAL.     Comedy  in  I  act;  about  45  minutes;  a 

O  pretty  comedy  especially  adapted  for  amateur  production 3    a 

|  |    MARBLE  ARCH,  THE.    Comedy:  one  of  the  most  popular  little  plays; 

i  act;  %  hour a    2    JJf 

MARRIED  LIFE.     Comedy;  companion  piece  to  "Single  Life";   3  acts; 


a  hours 5    5 


ijfhours 5    3    . 

:  '     MEN,  MAIDS,  AND  MATCHMAKERS.     Society  comedy  sparkling  with 

wit,  interest  and  human  nature ;  3  acts  ;  a  hours 4    4    }'. 

MIRIAM'S  CRIME.     Drama  ;  the  interest  in  this  play  is  kept  up  to  the  very  y|/ 

end;  3  acts  ;  2  hours 5    2 

DICK  &  FITZGERALD,  Publishers,    18  Ann  St.,  N.  Y. 


UCSB  LIBRARY 

•^-Gfl^lM 

THE  VARIETY 


A  GAY  OLD  MAN  AM  I. 


A  MUSICAL  MONOLOGUE, 


WRITTEN  AND   COMPOSED 


BY 


ALFBED  B.  SEDGWIOK. 


NEW  YORK 

DICK  &  FITZGERALD,  PUBLISHERS 
18  ANN  STREET 


A   GAY    OL13   MA]tf   AM   I. 


CHARACTER. 


POP  YOUNG,  an  old  fop. 


The  music  of  this  sketch,  arranged  for  orchestra,  viz :  first  and 
second  violins,  viola  (ad  lib),  bass,  flute,  clarinet,  and  cornet,  will 
be  sent  by  mail  on  receipt  of  $2. 50,  by  the  publishers  of  this  book. 


Entered  according  to  act  of  Congress  in  the  year  1875,  by  HAPHY  HOURS  COMPANY, 
in  the  office  of  the  Librarian  of  Congress  at  Washington. 


"**  There  is  no  charge  for  the  performance  of  this  sketch. 


A  GAY  OLD   MAN  AM  I. 


SCENE. — A  street  in  first  grooves. 
Enter  POP  YOUNG,  a. 

(  Pop  Young.  (Coughs.)  Ugh  !  ugh  !  ugh  !  Well,  they  tell  me 
I'm  growing  old  !  ^Now,.  do  Hook  like  it?  lean  sing  and  dance, 
and  dance  and  eing  with  the  best  of  them.  (Begins  to  dance,  and 
suddenly  stops  short  as  if  with  rhuematism.)  Oh.  there's  no  use  talk- 
ing. I  never  had  a  pain  like  that  when  I  danced  years  ago.  But  I 
feel  quite  young  for  all  that.  (Singt. 

OLD  MAN'S  LAUGHING  SONG. 

What  a  gay  old  man  am  I ! 

All  misfortune  I  defy  ! 

I  dance  and  sing,  and  Liugh  nil  day. 

Now,  who  so  merry  as  I,  .sirs  ? 

They  say  I'm  growing  very  old, 

Now,  would  you  think  so,  it  riot  told  T 

The  girls  all  smile  a^  I  pats  by, 

While  I  look  at  them  sort  o'bold, 

With  my  ha  !  ha  !  ha  !  ha  !  ha  !  ha  !  airs, 
Ha  !  ha  !  ha  !     I'm  not  so  very  old,  sira  ! 

Every  night  I  take  my  beer, 
Too  much  makes  me  feel  quite  queer; 
But  in  the  morn  when  I  get  up, 
No  signs  of  headache's  here,  sirs ! 
Some  people  plten  at  me  flout, 
Upon  the  street  as  I  go  out, 
What's  that  to  me,  as  long  as  I 
Feel  healthy,  hale  and  stout,  sirs  ? 
With  my  ha  !  ha  !  ha  !  Jbc. 


i  A  OAT  OLD  MAN  AM  I. 

I'm  very  often  told, 
Old  men  are  too  fond  of  gold ; 
But,  I  no  other  riches  seek, 
Than  to  feel  young,  now  I'm  old,  sire  ! 
There  are  some  say,   "  go  it  while  you'ra  young  I" 
But  this  is  sometimes  very  wrong, 
For  the  surest  way  to  enjoy  long  life, 
Is  to  live  till  you  get  quite  old,  sirs  ! 
With  my  ha  !  ha  !  ha  !  &c. 

ENCORE  VERSES. 

And  so  you  will  see  the  old  man  again,  will  you  ?     well,  I  don't 
fe«l  quite  well,  but  I  will  try  my  best. 

PITY  THE  SORROWS  OF  A  POOR  OLD  MAN. 

Oh  !  pity  my  sorrows  ;  a  poor  old  man, 

Who  can  no  longer  tarry  ; 

I  can't  get  a  wife,  do  all  I  can, 

I  really  want  to  marry. 

When  I  was  young,  I  often  ran, 

Witn  girls  to  laugh  and  mingla, 

Oh,  pity  the  sorrows  of  a  poor  old  man, 

Who  fears  he  must  die  single. 

When  young  a  maid- 
Made  me  afraid. 

Lest  she  should  pop  the  question  ! 
Bat  now  I'm  old, 
I've  grown  more  bold, 
A  married  life's  the  best  one. 
When  I  go  out— the  people  shout, 
Pull,  push,  and  tease  and  flout  me  ; 
I  have  no  son — I  have  no  one 
That  cares  at  all  about  me. 

I'm  not  much  more 

Than  eighty  four  ; 

So,  now's  your  time,  young  ladies  ; 

Tho'  old,  I'm  young, 

I  feel  quite  strong, 

Then,  hang  it,   who  pfraid  is  ? 

Oh  !  give  a  glance  behind  your  fan, 

Remember  time  is  precious  ; 

So  pity  the  sorrows  of  a  poor  old  man, 

And  let  the  parson  bless  us. 

CURTAIN, 


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OLD  MAN'S  LAUGHING  SONG. 


Words  and  Music  by  ALFRED  B.  SEDGWICK. 

:R:  Andantino.  v    


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OLD   MAN'S   LAUGHING  SONG. 


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With  my  ha,  ha,  ha  ! 


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I'm  not    so     ve  -  ry     old,   Sirs. 


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PITY  THE  SORROWS  OF  A  POOR 
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to  M.  F.    J 

fli    ALL  THE  COMFORTS  OF  HOME.     Comedy  by  William  Gillette.     Only 

fa  authorized  edition  of  this  famous  play  ;  4  acts  ;  2*4  hours  ...............    10    7     \l| 

•     BREAKING    HIS   BONDS.     Strong  drama  with  comic  underplay;   easily 

staged  ;  4  acts  ;  2  hours  ................................................    6    3    " 

[x    BUTTERNUT'S  BRIDE;   OR,   SHE  WOULD   BE  A  WIDOW.    Farce 
/yx  comedy  for  laughing  purposes  only  ;  3  acts  ;  2%  hours  ...................   n     6    ^ 

<!>     CAPTAIN   DICK.     Effective  drama,  founded  on  an  episode  of  the  Civil  War  ; 

<|>  3  acts  ;  2  hours  ......................................................    9    6    xfc 

?     DEACON,  THE.     Comedy  drama  that  is  simply  immense.    Alvyn  Joslyn 

type,  old  man  leading  character  ;  5  acts  ;  2%  hours  .......................     6    6    3 

/JX     EDWARDS  THE  SPY.    Drama  ;  a  brilliant  episode  of  the  Civil  War  ;  5  acts  ; 

/yy  2%  hours  .........................................................  10    4    \y 

to    ERIN    GO    BRAGH.     Up-to-date  Irish  drama;    both  serious  and   comic   in 

to  scope,  not  sensstional  ;  3  acts  ;  2  hours  .................................     54]! 

:     GOLDEN  GULCH.     (Th«  Government  Scout.)     Drama  that  combines  fun, 

sentiment,  and  exciting  situations  ;  3  acts  ;  a  ^  hours  ...................    n     3     J 

\    GYPSY    QUEEN,    THE.      Romantic  drama  with  bright  comedy  parts; 
/fX  4  acts  ;  2%  hours  ................................................  -----     53$ 

(*>    JAILBIRD,  THE.     Drama   of  city  life,  containing  a  vivid  plot  with  well- 

t  >  diversified  interest,  together  with  a  pretty  love-story;  5  acts;  2^  hours..     6    3    S  f 

^    JOHN    BRAG,   DECEASED.     Farce  comedy;   one  of  the  best  farces  ever 
;;  published;  nothing  slow  in  this  piece  ;  4  acts  ;  2%  hours  .................     8    5    }'. 

/|X     JOSIAH'S    COURTSHIP.      Farcical   comedy    drama;    uproarious  comedy 

/  x  features  alternate  with  forceful,  but  not  heavy  pathos  ;  4  acts  ;  2  hours....     7    4    if 

to     MAN   FROM  MAINE.    Comedy  drama  with*  wide-awake  hero  from  "Down 

East  ";  5  acts  ;  2%  hours  ...........................................    9    3     \' 

\    MISS  MOSHER  OF  COLORADO.     Comedy  drama  with  great  "charac- 

ter "  parts  ;  4  acts,  2j£  hours  ............  ..................  .  ......  ....    5    3    5% 

|X     MY   LADY    DARRELL.     Dr?ma  possessing  all   the  elements  of  success  ; 
A  powerful  situations,  effective  stage  pictures,  and  grand  climaxes  ;  4  acts  ;  $ 

A  2%  hours  .............................................................     '    *    j! 

w     NIGHT  OFF,  A.     Comedy  by   Augustin   Daly;   printed  from   the  original 

prompt-copy  ;  4  acts  ;  2%  hours  .......................................    6    5    \' 

'     PRISONER  OF  ANDERSONVILLE.     Military  comedy  drama.    An  excel- 
lent play  for  amateurs,  as  all  the  parts  are  good  and  evenly  divided  ;  4  acts  ; 
2%  hours  .............................................  ,  ...............  10    4    ^ 

t\     REGULAR    FLIRT,    A.      Up-to-date  comedy,    especially   recommended  to 
t\  those  who  have  produced  the  author's  "Just  for  Fun  ";  3  acts  ;  2  hours...    4    4    x? 

*    SEVEN-TWENTY-EIGHT.     By  Augu:,tin  Daly.     There  have  been   several 
t  I  imitations  of  this  comedy    but  none  of  them  approaches  the  original  ;  ' 

4  acts  ;  2%  hours  ....................  ..  ................................    7    4    J 

j    SHAUN  AROON.     Stirring  drama  of  home  life  in  Ireland  ;  a  simple  real  pic-  ^  -f 

ture  of  country  life  in  the  Emerald  Isle  ;  3  acts;  2  hours  ..................    7    3    ^> 

I    SQUIRE    TOMPKINS'    DAUGHTER.      Strong  comedy  drama;    5  acts; 

2%  hours  ............................................................     5    a    * 

STEEL  KING,  THE.     Comedy  drama  with  brisk  action;  depicts  the  Strug- 

gle  between  labor  and  capital  ;  4  acts  •  2%  hours  .........................     S    3    5 

[    WHAT'S  NEXT?     Farce  comedy;   3  acts;   plays  150  minutes;   raises   150 

l»"ghs  ...............................................................    7    *    <> 


WHITE  LIE,  A.     Comedy  drama;   abounds   in  laughable  comedy  features 

and  strong  situations  of  serious  interest ;  4  acts  ;  2%  hours 4    } 


DICK  &  FITZGERALD,  Publishers,   18  Ann  St.,  N.  Y. 
^JCC<€<iC€CCCCCCCCCCCCCCtCCCCCCCCCC€<€€€€<€< 


